Reflecting On My Mental Flaws Strengths Modern Wisdom Podcast 263

Author:

Video Creator’s Channel Chris Williamson

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No One Can Beat You At Being

you and as I’ve embraced my weirdness and the fact that I don’t necessarily fit into an archetype as tons and tons and tons of people. Do they all feel this and they nerf the edges. They round off the edges of the interesting stuff that they do in life to try and make themselves fit into the bell curve of what normal is. If you’re trying to be normal by definition, you’re regressing to the mean normal people get normal results. Extraordinary people get extraordinary results.

We All Want Somehow Everybody Wants To

both be the most popular most liked person on the planet and also Elon, Musk or Conor McGregor or one of the Kardashians or something and you think you don’t get it both ways. Those people have ridiculous outcomes because they have ridiculous inputs. You can choose one but you can’t choose both this year. ‘s been a year of living kind of groundhog day over and over again. It doesn’t matter how varied your life is everyone in one form or another has had the guard rails brought in on variety in life and I think what that can cause you to do is probably get into in the same way as you get into lifestyle patterns.

Habitually.

You get into thought patterns as well and that includes narratives around how you see things going just how you perceive stuff. I walked back into my house when I got here and I looked at the kitchen and the kitchen looked different like it actually looked like the dimensions of things were different. I was like. Has something been moved in here and it worked out that I hadn’t, but it had been the best.

Part Four Weeks Since Id Seen It

and there’s a concept that the SaS use called a break point and it’s the moment before they will breach a door, so they’ll get stuck up outside of the door and that break point. There is where they kind of rest reset and plan to go in and I kind of considered that trip out to Dubai as a little bit of a break point. I like that it’s cool concept isn’t it yeah but anyway we’re rolling so Charlotte Fox Webber welcome welcome back you are so much less super pregnant than the last time that we spoke it’s a pleasure to be here and I’m I’m happy to not be pregnant. Although I have a beautiful baby from it. You gotta you got a baby out of it yeah, but you’re just like now half the size thank you so.

What Are We Doing Today You Wanted

to do this thing? You said I have an idea for an episode. I want to come on and talk absolutely I. I have a real interest in understanding the life of a podcaster and you’re a particularly good one. I shouldn’t just generalize it as a life of a podcaster because there are so many and that that doesn’t narrow it down enough You ask exceptional questions you are constantly curious. I would say curiosity must be a driving force for you.

What Is It Like To Be A Question

asker a seeker a constant conversationalist. I want to get into your mind. I’m I’m curious for what it says about you psychologically um I think that there are certain similarities between how you approach things and and my work as a psychotherapist trying to understand inquiring probing looking at what’s underneath. engaging intensely wholeheartedly um, but it can also be a way of avoiding and not disclosing. So I’m here to challenge you in a way because we’ve we’ve had some very interesting exchanges and conversations and I just want to turn it around because that’s what I do that sounds good Yeah I I’m not sure what I’m in for today, but yeah let’s get started.

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Lets Do This Okay You Can Always Tell

me when I’m pushing too much and and you don’t have to say anything you don’t want to say so, what is it like to constantly ask questions that’s an interesting one when I was in Dubai Recently, we were me and a friend that was out there with George We were at a party that was very very not socially distanced at a around a pool with a few hundred people and three different sets. Of people said the same thing to both of us and they asked us separately? Why are you asking so many questions in a kind of a suspicious way. The first thing that I identified was that we asked a lot of questions because curious. The second thing was that in a place like Dubai, which is perhaps a little bit showy and to do with wealth. It’s obvious that the game of tennis that people play when they converse is.

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Im Waiting For You To Finish

saying your thing so I can say my thing um being honest. I was probably quite a selfish conversationalist for a long time and it’s been trained into me that actually in a conversation. The most selfish thing that you can do is ask questions because you don’t know what the other person knows you only know what you know so by asking. questions you elicit very interesting stories I tweeted something today actually about the fact that people who think they’re introverts might not be introverts. They might just have friends that suck and I certainly notice I I ask fewer questions when I’m with people that I’m not really that interested in what they have to say which sounds sounds kind of terrible, but makes also makes sense like you’re not going to dig as hard in a gold mine that you don’t believe there’s any gold in right so yeah.

I Certainly Have Cultivated That And I Think

weaponizing curiosity or that’s not right disciplining curiosity into a effective mode of discourse is something that I’ve really really enjoyed doing and it’s kind of been stepped up especially this year and I really feel that it’s an art form like the art of asking good questions without breaking. the flow and without sort of losing where you’re at and guiding the person that you’re with has made for outside of the show. It’s made for some of the deepest connections that I’ve ever had me and my friend again, George. We did this flight out to Dubai and from Amsterdam to Dubai is seven hours on the nose and we didn’t stop speaking for the entire way there and wow just us asking like we went from our sex robots ethical to what’s the future of Bitcoin to like everything and there’s this poor poor girl sat behind him, who must have been the only British person probably within about three meters, and she didn’t have any headphones, and she must have been thinking just shut the bleep up because to everyone else it’s just foreign language noise, but to her she was probably hearing our sex robot. Bitcoin myriad discussion so yes that’s it.

I Enjoy It.

I enjoy asking questions and it’s something that I wish. I’d known a lot a lot sooner that it makes for great connections, great friendships and a wonderful conversation fascinating how old were you when you really discovered the value of asking questions only really since doing this show um you mentioned curiosity earlier on which is the first of my five core values and for everyone who hasn’t gone and done it yet Google Taylor Pearson core values and the exercise will take you a couple of hours. But it’s been one of the most important things. I’ve done this year, which is to identify what my life is built around in terms of values spells out a word the word is cases and the c in cases is curiosity so curious I relate to that do you oh.

As A Therapist, A Professional Psychotherapist For

many many years, there’s nothing worse than a therapist who lacks curiosity be interested Can he be a therapist without having curiosity? I mean you shouldn’t be right yes and it’s a sign of something it can be a real sign of burnout as well. I I think curiosity is a huge energy source yeah that’s interesting so tell me how you feel when people ask you questions does it ever kind of make you feel uncomfortable or turn the spotlight on you in an awkward way not really I think for a long time again only child background and then coming into doing this sort of a an industry. I’ve always been used to having at least some form of center of attention and perhaps my desire now to kind of discipline my curiosity into questions is me casting off what was. Once me very much being kind of selfish when it came to these sorts of conversations. It was all about me.

Me Me And Now This Is Me

almost going in the polar opposite direction and still finding joy in that I don’t find it awkward at all it’s like a little bit of the old me comes out when I get to talk like this, where I get to indulge and it’s my turn it’s me in the line right um right, but I genuinely do enjoy creating a platform that allows whoever I’m speaking to to be at their absolute best like a ton of things that I give as advice to other podcasters stuff. For instance that the audience will never see like when I’m on a skype call with someone I’ll nod all the time just as they’re talking I’ll just keep on nodding like this. like that Churchill dog in the back of the car like just constantly going away because I want the other person to feel comfortable and confident like that you’re encouraging yeah. I I hear you this is what you’re saying keep on going mate keep on going mate that sounds good that sounds good um so. I love I love doing that and that has been a really interesting transformation and there may be.

I Think Its Perhaps Something That

young guys get a lot. This sort of male posturing When you’re you know you break out of your teens into your 20s. You want to be a an alpha guy. You want to be attractive. You want to be confident and charismatic and you can often mistake brashness and over self–sufficiency for that and I think yeah by far whether it’s trying to get laid or trying to make.

Having Curiosity, Genuine Curiosity And What

other people say It was enough that a bunch of different people at a party who were drunk highlighted like what the bleep are you doing asking questions so do you ever encounter people who really don’t open up to you and how do you deal with that being honest my sample size For how long I’ve been doing This is probably not that big right how long have you been doing this 18 months. I’d guess speaking like this consistently yeah um and yeah, I think that was definitely one of the things again any sort of budding aspiring podcasters out there if you’re not used to asking questions that’s probably the first skill that you need to learn that it’s your job to just get that curiosity turn it into like a pharmaceutical nuclear grade weapon and fire it at the other. person as much as possible um yeah, so I I sometimes people don’t want to open up in person, but you kind of get that impression if you’re not on the same wavelength anyway if you’re not vibrating at the same frequency you kind.

Summary

No one can beat you at being you and as I’ve embraced my weirdness, I don’t necessarily fit into an archetype as tons and tons of people. I think what that can cause you to do is probably get into in the same way as you get into lifestyle patterns. Habitually. You get into thought patterns as well and that includes narratives around how you see things going just how you perceive stuff.& I walked back into my house when I got here and I looked at the kitchen and the kitchen looked different like it actually looked like the dimensions of things were different.& There is where they kind of rest reset and plan to go in and I kind of considered that trip out to Dubai as a little bit of a break point. I like that it’s cool concept isn’t it yeah but I like to like it’s a cool concept. The SaS use a . break point and it’s the moment before they will breach a door, so they’ll get stuck up outside…. Click here to read more and watch the full video